In Real Life | The Bullying Epidemic

Thanks to The Bully Project for sponsoring my writing. 

Visit their website to join the movement and learn more.

Often, in the emails I get 

from those of you smarter than me 

about your online trail, 

I get asked what I do in real life. 

The common guesses are:


comedian
master gardener
puppy chef

No one ever guesses that I'm an educator. 

(well, in real life, that gets assumed often)

What I DO do in real life is kind of complicated.

The easiest way to say it is that I work for a school district

in the evil central office

(booo...hiss!! I know, I know)

and I get to "lead"

(trust me, there are LOTS of people "leading")

our work on family and community engagement.

I also have 2 years, 7 months and 9 days to close

the achievement gap.

But that's the half of my job that gets controversial 

and we'll leave that conversation for it's own little post.

Anyhow.

Back to the parents.

In my work with parents, 

we do parent education

about their rights and responsibilities

as partners in their child's education.

We also help to coordinate parent advisory groups

that help us figure out things like 

how to most efficiently get new products out to them

(ie, at the high school level,

we have a really neat "on track" website

that parents and students can look at

to see if they are passing their state tests,

getting enough credits, 

and attending enough school

to be successful once they graduate high school).

But the bulk of our parent engagement efforts at the 

central office/district level,

quite frankly,

is about family concerns.

And many, bordering on most,

of those concerns

are about bullying and harassment.

I work with a Family Engagement Specialist 

who does intake to hear what the situation is.

Often, parents are to the point that they have kept their kids 

out of school

(!!!)

because their child is just not comfortable

in the learning environment.

It's often hard to imagine the craziness we hear about

being remotely real.

Here is a great illustration of what we deal with.

This is the trailer for Bully.


***IMPORTANT NOTE: 
The rating for Bully has just been changed to PG-13
Go and TAKE YOUR KIDS***

So much of what is in that TINY trailer breaks my heart.

Every. Single. Day.

And the American school system's response to bullying

IS at a crisis point.

I see it in my own system.

I see it in my own state.

Just recently, 

our state Office of the Superintendent for Public Instruction

(OSPI for short, basically our state dept of ed)

released revised bullying and harassment reporting, training and investigation guidelines.

It was not a moment too soon.

When I see the Bully trailer, 

I see some of what I see everyday:

kids bullied on the way to and from school

really YOUNG targets- not just middle and high schoolers

kids so uncomfortable with school, they take their own lives

parents who ring the alarm and are told "nothing is wrong"

the pervasive belief that "kids will be kids"

What you don't see in the trailer

(but maybe it shows up in the movie)

and you definitely see all the time in my district:


bullying has no color boundaries - it isn't just a white kid thing
it isn't just the geeks that get bullied
kids so uncomfortable with school, they stop going
privacy laws rendering actions taken by a school "invisible" 

Like any issue,

there are so many layers to bullying.

I plan to see the movie and to promote it as a tool in my district

for talking with kids about what is going on.

There are lots of great things happening across this nation

to stop this now.

At the risk of getting too technical,

I'll note that we're a school district that uses 

a system that promotes sharing with kids what 

positive behavior is supposed to look like

and providing supports for kids that don't 

meet those expectations.

While that goes a long way towards ensuring

no kid ever skips school because he or she feels unsafe,

that hasn't eradicated the problem.

Especially given how much bullying happens 

online, on the way to and from school and outside of school hours.

The link is that the kids know each other from school

and that school is where they spend the most time together.

But it does get difficult when it happens off school grounds

(kids can be savvy that way)

and we need school partnership to intervene outside of school.

That's to say it takes all of us.

This is not just an issue for those who have kids

or work at schools.

This is an issue for ALL. OF. US.

Together,

we can all ensure

that kids never

get so desperate

that they take their own lives

physically, emotionally, or academically.

Why does this matter to me?

This matters to me because he thinks sewing (and rockets) are cool.

For a black boy in a society that generally says kids like him

only fit in if they're good at sports, hustling, or "music"

he sticks out.

And when you stick out - for being different, for being good at something, for being your own drummer on a different beat,

that makes you a target.

I don't know what I would do if he took his life because 

someone thought his joys and talents were "weird".

Check that.

I know what I'd do.

And though orange is my favorite color,

I don't need a new jumpsuit anytime soon.

That's how outrageous this bullying epidemic is.

Please.

See the movie.

At least watch the trailer.

Definitely check out the Facebook.com/Bullymovie page.

Please and thank you.

I was selected for this sponsorship by the Clever Girls Collective. 

Find showings in your area for The Bully Project 

and buy tickets here.

*** 

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